L’Enfant Manque

the price of a failed boy is a woman who was born a girl. this is about girls

about the first born who were meant to be boys but were born girls clothed in boys attire since birth to perfect the dreams of parents who prayed for a son, the marker of success, the marker of pride.

L’enfant manque

the marker of shame

the markers of failure

the markers of scars she carries between her legs will be her clothing, her language

she will meet the other first borns- birthed right, the boys.. who played being boys like boys and lived in the wings of their fathers. boys…

Yet,  she will not fear.

Like they too, she sports the haircut, her imprints on the ball.  She too will know his waist, as she rides like boys, but never like great men. Her father beamed with pride, and she beamed belonging among great men.

When her sister is born, she will learn that girls who dresses as boys but will be read as failed girls becoming great men. She will be read as a child play. It will be pulled right of her tights by great men and it will fall into her lap and she will carry it with each scar that he will inflict. .They will beat her voice out of her, whisper if she died, it would not matter to me while smiling, and scope her childhood with their right middle finger. From that day on, she will learn to wear her skirts loosely around her tights, sporting the cut ready for a ride.


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